{"quotes":[{"text":"This is stolen? We're in a stolen jet?'Not stolen,' said Donegan Bane from the co-pilot's seat.'Almost stolen,' Gracious corrected.'Semi-stolen,' said Donegan.'Quasi-stolen,' said Gracious. Aurora's frown did not turn upside down. 'So is it stolen or not?'Donegan and Gracious hesitated.'Yes,' they both said together.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["funny","humor","maleficent","pilot","planes","skulduggery","tanith-lee"],"id":23124,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"Violence?'Skulduggery said. 'Violence is never the answer, until it's the only answer.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["skulduggery","the-answer","the-only-one-she-ever-feared","the-question","true","violence"],"id":92392,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"Have to be honest with you Darquesse, I cannot feel that. That must be one of your special abilities, because to me, it looks like you just killed a whole bunch of people for no reason.'Oh,' said Darquesse. 'That's so sad.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["crazy","darquesse","death","humour","insane","not-normal","psychopath","skulduggery","so-crazy","sociopath","you-crazy-psycho-you"],"id":208461,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"Do you think we’ll be waiting long?” Valkyrie asked,keeping her voice low.“The last time we were in this building, we accused theGrand Mage of being a traitor,” Skulduggery said. “Yes, I thinkwe’ll be waiting long.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["skulduggery","traitor","waiting"],"id":216882,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"I need a weapon,” Valkyrie muttered.“You’re an Elemental with a Necromancer ring, trained ina variety of martial arts by some of the best fighters in the world,” Skulduggery pointed out. “I’m fairly certain that makes you a weapon.”“I mean a weapon you hold. You have a gun, Tanith has a sword... I want a stick.”“I’ll buy you a stick for Christmas.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["christmas","humour","skulduggery","stick","weapon"],"id":277977,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"It was a trap. It was so obviously a trap.Darquesse smiled.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["don-t-even-care","humour","i-want","skulduggery","trap","wow"],"id":315604,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"I should go in alone,' Valkyrie said, speaking loudly to be heard. 'If we both go in, it'll look to official.'So I'll just stay out here?' Skulduggery asked. 'But what'll I do? There's no one to talk to. It's boring.'You're standing on the roof of a train,' Valkyrie pointed out. 'If you find this boring, you really need your head examined. Just wait here. I'll do what has to be done and I'll be find out.'Fine,' he said, sounding grumpy. 'Don't be long.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["funny","skulduggery"],"id":351790,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"The workshop door opened and Skulduggery emerged. 'Ryan,' he said, 'stop leaning on my car.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["funny","pleasant","skulduggery"],"id":396925,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"He put on his hat and wrapped his scarf around his jaw, but did without the wig and the sunglasses. He clicked his key chain and the car beeped and the doors locked.'That's it?'He looked up. 'Sorry?'Aren't you afraid it might get stolen? We're not exactly in a good part of town.'It's got a car alarm.'Don't you, like, cast a spell or something? To keep it safe?'No. It's a pretty good car alarm.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["funny","skulduggery","skulduggery-pleasant"],"id":409795,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"I love stories with a happy ending,” Inspector Me said.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["happy","inspector-me","skulduggery"],"id":416722,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":11,"pages":2,"next":"?page=2\u0026page_size=10"}}