Pastor McFucking Bride this . . . Pastor McFucking Bride that. Fuck him!

And the game of dominoes is much like life: You gotta play the bones you’ve pulled. It don’t matter if you got seven doubles in your damn hand.

Distinctive facial features of a parent are poor people’s paternity test.

I never really grew up until I had kids.

It was not till I experimented with seeds plucked straight from a growing plant that I had my first success...The first thrill of creation...The first taste of blood. This, surely, must be akin to the pride of paternity...Indeed, many soured bachelors would wager that it must be almost as wonderful to see the first tiny crinkled leaves of one's first plant as to see the tiny crinkled face of one's first child.