{"quotes":[{"text":"Anyway, Arianna and I left the castle very late one evening. I knew the knight on guard at the drawbridge so I hit hit him over the head because I didn't want to hurt him.Garion blinked.'I knew he'd be honor-bound to try to stop us,' Lelldorin explained. 'I didn't want to have to kill him, so I hit him over the head.'I suppose that makes sense,' Garion said dubiously.'Arianna's almost positive he won't die.'DIE?'I hit him just a little too hard, I think.","author":"David Eddings","tags":["awesome","crazy","funny","hilarious","lelldorin","the-belgariad"],"id":13940,"author_id":"David+Eddings"},{"text":"When you're truly awesome, you know that it's actually a burden and wish day after day to be relieved of such a curse. Think of about 95% of the superheroes.","author":"Criss Jami","tags":["awesome","burden","curse","heroes","superhero","wish"],"id":14354,"author_id":"Criss+Jami"},{"text":"Don't open the door to strangers,' said her dad. 'Unless they're selling something. Then open the door and see if I'd like it. If I'd like it, buy it for me. But nothing cheap. I have standards. Nothing too expensive, either. My standards aren't that high.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["awesome","brilliant","crazy","fun","funny","hilarious","hysterical","make-me-laugh","witty"],"id":15349,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"I hope that Los Altos is one of the first cities to have self-driving cars, and if that's true, well, awesome, because there's a lot of parking lots that we could get rid of and use for parks. That would be amazing!","author":"Anne Wojcicki","tags":["hope","awesome","true "],"id":16035,"author_id":"Anne+Wojcicki"},{"text":"There was one of two things I had a right to: liberty or death. If I could not have one, I would have the other; for now man should take me alive.","author":"Harriet Tubman","tags":["awesome","determination"],"id":18179,"author_id":"Harriet+Tubman"},{"text":"This isn't the first time I've used this, and the test subject showed no signs of impaired cognitive ability.'Who was the test subject?' asked Aurora.'I test everything out on myself before taking it into the field.'She stared at him. 'You zapped your own brain?'And it didn't do me any harm apart from the dizziness and the vomiting spells and the weirdly persistent ringing in my ears. Also the blackouts and the mood swings and the creeping paranoia. Apart from that, zero side effects, if you don't count the numb fingertips. Which I don't.","author":"Derek Landy","tags":["awesome","brilliant","clever","epic","funny","hilarious","humor","humour","make-me-laugh","witty"],"id":19045,"author_id":"Derek+Landy"},{"text":"You don't have to change that much for it to make a great deal of difference. A few simple disciplines can have a major impact on how your life works out in the next 90 days, let alone in the next 12 months or the next 3 years.","author":"Aamir Sarfraz (aamir rajput khan)","tags":["awesome","inspirational","loving-yourself","mind-body-spirit","thinking-with-a-great-mind","time"],"id":20033,"author_id":"Aamir+Sarfraz+%28aamir+rajput+khan%29"},{"text":"Did those nice church ladies come by again?' He nodded. 'I asked them if a man died and then the woman remarried, and then the three of them met in heaven, would it be a sin for them to have a threesome, since they were all married in God's eye. And they decided they were late to be somewhere else.","author":"Ilona Andrews","tags":["andrea","ascanio","awesome","church","funny","hilarious","kate-daniels","threesome"],"id":28337,"author_id":"Ilona+Andrews"},{"text":"If I wanna die I may be awesome that I fear nothing. So I can do anything in this earth. Cause I am about to die. And If I start to do anything in this earth, the worst can be, I will die. This is the way I make impossibles possible.","author":"Arefin Bashar Arif","tags":["achievement","awesome","death","die","fear","fearless","impossible","insane","motivational","possible"],"id":29453,"author_id":"Arefin+Bashar+Arif"},{"text":"Okay, let's see if I got this straight. The butt is the new breast, and the lower back is the new ankle. Now if only we could figure out where the brain has moved.","author":"Celia Rivenbark","tags":["ankles","awesome","back","breast","butt","fashion","silly-trends","strange-fashion","strange-trends","trends"],"id":29653,"author_id":"Celia+Rivenbark"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":258,"pages":26,"next":"?page=2\u0026page_size=10"}}