{"text":"I'm sick of the ignorance that lack of funding has generated, of the fathers who apporach me at dinner parties with their four-year-old girls clasped to their pant legs and say, 'Yeah, but studies say kids can buy drugs more easily than they can buy alcohol.' To which I always respond, 'I guess that means you keep heroin in your liquor cabinet?","author":"Koren Zailckas","tags":["alcoholism","irony"],"id":15978,"author_id":"Koren+Zailckas"}