{"author":"Cat Clarke","author_id":"Cat+Clarke","total_quotes":18,"quotes":[{"text":"Has this version of me been lurking there all along, somewhere deep below the surface, biding its time, waiting for its chance to make an appearance?","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["reflection","thought"],"id":6748,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"I can just close my eyes and let myself fall into oblivion. Maybe I'll hit the exact same rocks and my blood will mingle with his and maybe there's some kind of life after death and he's waiting for me there with his hand outstretched just like mine.But...I don't want to die.I try to twist my body backwards and pain shoots up my neck.It's too late.I chose life too late.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["chilling","death","inspirational","jem","questioning","regret","suicide"],"id":15523,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"The butterflies in my stomach turn into vampire bats as we pull up to the school.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["school"],"id":18382,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"I didn't just wake up one morning and think, 'I'm a boy!' It sort of crept up on me and tapped me on the shoulder a few times before I started to pay attention I began to think that the word 'girl' didn't quite fit me. It was like a shoe that was too small -- it pinched me.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["middle-school","self-discovery","trans","trans-issues"],"id":64977,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"This is the real way a friendship ends. Not with some huge screaming row, but with a gradual withdrawal. You’d think it would be less painful this way.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["friendship","laine-s-fave","sad"],"id":83658,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"It’s amazing, the lies you can tell yourself. Even more amazing, the lies you can believe when you’re desperate enough.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["lies","persuasion","yourself"],"id":107359,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"I wanted to grab his stupid ears and smash his stupid head against the door until his stupid brains leaked out. Instead, I did nothing.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["cat-clarke","entangled","ethan","grace"],"id":158502,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"It's entirely possible to get to know someone without actually seeing them in person. In fact, it's better like that because none of the superficial stuff gets in the way. You really get to know a person. And it's easier to express yourself when you're writing things down. At least it is for me. I like to order my thoughts, and delete them if they don't make any sense. You can't do that in real life.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["love","romance","social-networking","teen"],"id":252398,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"That was progress, right there. Except no one would ever know how hard I was working to keep my temper under control, because the whole point of keeping your temper under control is not doing things like throwing a milk carton in someone's face even though they clearly deserve it.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["anger"],"id":260855,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"},{"text":"I know people think suicide is selfish, and maybe sometimes it really is. But what happened to Kai was beyond what anyone should have to cope with. I didn’t blame him, not really. It just broke my heart that I wasn’t enough to keep him here.","author":"Cat Clarke","tags":["pain","suicide"],"id":266565,"author_id":"Cat+Clarke"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":18,"pages":2,"next":"?page=2\u0026page_size=10"}}