{"author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke","total_quotes":29,"quotes":[{"text":"Secret elisions within families are suddenly revealed by self-execution, and just as quickly sheeted with excuses, blame, and counter-blame. But sense is made of the world only through relationship between action and reaction, symptom and cause. No change is possible without analysis of accountability.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["accountability","action","analysis","blame","cause","counter-blame","excuses","families","reaction","secret-elisions","self-execution","suicide","symptom"],"id":24976,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"Marriage is never static. There are peaks and troughs, cycles. It is easy to forget that this shifting landscape is really only ever a reflection of the self. Our capacity for attachment determines the kind of mate we attract, and it is through this mate that we are forever transformed – marriage as alchemy, but also as a mirror.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["attachment","connection","intimacy","love","marriage","relationship","self-esteem","yoga"],"id":69950,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"Delirious as it can be, sex is only one kind of intimacy, and yet has become the cultural catchment area for all kinds of needs because our understanding of intimacy is so poor. Brutal work schedules, related geographic isolation, and the concomitant fracturing of families has meant that there is little time for intimacy, and even less to teach the necessary skills. But intimacy, the axis of romance, is slow, based on the sharing of a life rather than show. In terms of intimacy, folding laundry together or sharing the feeding of a child can have more impact than the most extravagant bouquet.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["intimacy","love","marriage","motherhood","parenthood"],"id":81601,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"On first hearing that little voice – as fine and friable, I felt, as cotton thread, the impact on my soul was that of the highest magnitude of earthquake, those that occur every hundred years, say, or every thousand. The old shell I called myself cracked and was swallowed by a sudden crevasse, and just as suddenly was lost in the commotion.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["giving-birth","labor","love","motherhood","parenthood"],"id":91302,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"I don't know why I wanted a girl,' he says, as if to himself. 'I mean, I wouldn't swap Louis, but when they said, 'It's a boy!', I thought: 'Oh, well.' Everyone else was incredibly pleased that it was a boy – grandparents are always very pleased when it's a boy for some reason. Another one's on the way, and I hope it's going to be a girl. After that, I'll stop. I think it can be a real mistake to sort of plug away for a particular sex … you end up having millions and they're all boys.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["fatherhood","london-fields","martin-amis","money","parenthood"],"id":123894,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"Throughout history, the most brutal cultures have always been distinguished by maternal-infant separation.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["attachement-parenting","attachment","babies","child-rearing","motherhood","parenthood"],"id":139114,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"What's required of me in the field is to feel,' Stirton says with emphasis. 'And trying to take that feeling and put it in a form that communicates a particular set of emotions or circumstances - whether that involves depicting masculine pride, or a particular kind of suffering, or love, or closeness - my primary job is to feel and to try to put that feeling into some kind of visual form. My goal is to get to the heart of each story, you know? I’m trying to evolve in my work.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["brent-stirton","canon","getty-photographer","photography","prize-winning-photography"],"id":151348,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"Time is ungovernable, but grief presents us with a choice: what do we do with the savage energies of bereavement? What do we do with the memory - or in the memory - of the beloved? Some commemorate love with statuary, but behavior, too, is a memorial, as is a well-lived life. In death, there is always the promise of hope. The key is opening, rather than numbing, ourselves to pain. Above all, we must show our children how to celebrate existence in all its beauty, and how to get up after life has knocked us down, time and again. Half-dead, we stand. And together, we salute love. Because in the end, that's all that matters. How hard we loved, and how hard we tried.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["bereavement","death","depression","grief-inspirational","loss","love","memory","mourning","suicide"],"id":184734,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"Repudiating the vulnerability I felt had wrecked the lives of women around me, I modelled myself on my controlled father. I wanted his freedom and his focus. To him, a family was an aquarium: controlled, contained. To the women I knew, a family was everything.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["family","fatherhood","feminism","growing-up-growing-pains","motherhood"],"id":195465,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"},{"text":"In our circle, stress was a valuable status marker: I stress, therefore I am.","author":"Antonella Gambotto-Burke","tags":["anxiety","career-development","depression","stress","work"],"id":198231,"author_id":"Antonella+Gambotto-Burke"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":29,"pages":3,"next":"?page=2\u0026page_size=10"}}